State of the “Steph” address…
“Praise may not shift our circumstances, but it will definitely begin to change our hearts. We don’t always get to choose our situations, but we can choose how we live through them.” - Lysa TerKeurst
This past weekend was another busy one with a baseball tournament for Toby, consisting of five games over the course of Friday evening, Saturday, and Sunday. His team took first AGAIN, going undefeated through the weekend. It was a lot of fun watching the boys play ball, and they really came together as a team both on and off the field. It has been such a joy to watch them become friends and encourage each other to be the best. My mama heart swells with humble pride as this team wins in such a classy way.
Additionally, I mentioned previously that Darek is coaching this team, and he is doing a fantastic job!! His patience (where did this come from?), encouragement, calm temperament with the umpires, and overall coaching ability are truly impressive. He seems to be in his element on the baseball field.
[Thank you, Pah (Darek’s dad), for all you have done to lead to this point. We sure do miss you, especially in this season! You would love watching and cheering for this team!! It’s still surreal that you are not here with us. Is there baseball in Heaven?]
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In other news, I am personally doing well this week. I feel almost ‘normal’ and am thoroughly enjoying my time at home with the kids. I am also finding it a little challenging because I want to fit everything in to this week when I feel well. Today I have back to back tire rotations for both cars and then the girls are finally having their ever so coveted play date with friends from school. Sometimes this is a challenge, as our school friends live all over the metro, however, I am thankful we can make this one work. It is a quieter week in the afternoons as Toby doesn’t have any baseball games.
Makaiya played softball on Monday and again last night, and she is quite the force with her bat! She shows a lot of promise, if she chooses to continue playing as she gets older. Carina and Makaiya are also in swimming lessons every Wednesday, and Carina has a gymnastics camp on Friday mornings. So far so good! Her form and strength have already improved!! And, yesterday I had lunch with two of my very dear friends since high school. One lives in out of state and the other over an hour and a half away, so we don’t see each other very often. I love that time and distance have not hindered our friendship. It was incredibly sweet and filled my heart.
Next week I have my infusion on Tuesday instead of Monday. I was not particularly thrilled with this change, as I also have to go to the M Health Masonic Cancer Center in Minneapolis instead of Southdale in Edina. The schedule was full, and because I am “extra special” (hahaha) with my regimen, these are the only two locations that can administer the protocol I need. All of this to say that I have come to terms with it, but I am still bummed. I’m praying that it doesn’t throw my whole week of chemo-into recovery off as well. Makaiya’s birthday is that Saturday the 25th, and I want to be feeling well. Is that selfish? Maybe. But it’s how I feel, so I’m sharing it. I don’t want to come across ungrateful for the clinic staff and the entire fact that I have been given this opportunity that many people in the world do not have. I wholeheartedly admit that I sometimes focus so intensely on my one small piece to the puzzle, that I lose sight of the entire picture. I trust that God is using my story for His glory, and I pray that it will benefit many people in all different trials of life.
I am including a link below for an immunotherapy trial where 14 of 14 recipients are in complete remission after receiving this treatment. This is HUGE, and another reminder that God has given us medicine in many different forms, but ultimately this therapy allows the immune system to heal the body. I can’t help but believe that it is not by accident or chance that this is the case.
Recent News and clinical trial with promising results!
There is a song by Toby Mac called Undeniable that says, “Which is harder to believe, that You don’t exist? Or, that you orchestrated ALL of this!?!?!” I honestly believe that the evidence of God is too great to ignore, especially as studies such as this are released. “Livin’ in the world that is so confusing, You’re the passion that I’m never losing, ‘cause I believe!”
While I am unsure if there are any immunotherapy options available to me, based on my cancer type and genetic testing, I continue to trust that I am on the path God has intended for me at this time. I still have many moments (especially when I feel good) where I want to rip the port out of my chest and be finished with this. It’s not comfortable. I think that will be the sweetest day - having the port removed!
In the meantime, I will choose to find Joy in each day. I will embrace my story, and continue to praise God along the way.
